He Stood at My Door

Since God is scientific, the heavens, the waters, the lands, and all creatures echo His existence, why then, mid 1998 did the Lord show up on my doorstep?


Jesus knocks at the door

Spiritual Lethargy

It was summer of 1998. My husband was out on an errand, and I was home alone. I was newly married to Arthur and had become somewhat dependent on his spiritual influence, zeal, and direction. Before we met, I was all in with my relationship with Christ; prayed three times a day and read my Bible religiously. But early in my marriage to a spiritual giant, is how I saw and still see him, looks like I became somewhat spiritually relaxed, or you might call it lazy. I still prayed and read the scriptures, but much of my personal time with the Lord was now in waiting on devotion with my husband. Well, this day was going to be different. This day I decided I am going to spend quality time with the Lord; one-on-one, like I was used to doing.


Revelation 3:1-19 - the Visitor

My husband and I had rented an upstairs apartment from a lady who owned a duplex. Our landlord and her daughter occupied the lower floor. We had a good rapport with them. On this faithful day, I decided I would sit comfortably on our couch in the living room area and begin my devotion in Revelation chapter three. It was a nice quiet peaceful day; the sun was mid-sky, and all was well. In this reading Jesus speaks to several churches concerning their spiritual condition. He approved some and He rebuked some. Those He rebuked had a chance to repent from their errors. I was delving into this reading and gleaning all I could. Right as a got to the end of verse 19 that reads; "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent", I heard a knocking on my door. This knock was very clear, and it came from the lower floor's main door. Immediately I put my Bible down beside me on the couch and went to our bedroom's window that was located on an angle right above the lower floor's main door. From here I could see from upstairs whoever stood at the door downstairs.


As I looked down at the individual standing there, I remember thinking, "why didn't he just ring the doorbell? It's right in front of him." I tried to see if I could see the face of the individual, but the way he was standing, I could only recognize it was a gentleman. I also noticed he had long, grey and black hair, not particularly groomed. He stood tall. He was slightly leaned forward toward the door as he knocked. This was all happening in under a minute. From my vantage point and the color of his hair, I decided it was an elderly gentleman and I didn't want to keep him waiting. So, I quickly ran down the stairs still wondering why he didn't just ring the doorbell. It was a steep long stairwell, but I glided down very quickly. I unlocked the door and pulled it open to salute the visitor, and to my surprise there was no one standing there. "Well, that is strange", I thought to myself. "Where could he have gone so quickly?", I wondered. I ascertained he couldn't have gone far seeing he was a senior gentleman. I began calling, "hello! hello!". I went around the house and kept calling. I was puzzled. I looked up and down our long street that has no bend for a long way out, but still, no one in sight. Somewhat mystified, I finally gave up my search and went back upstairs to continue my devotion.


Revelation 3:20 - The Reveal

So now I am back upstairs on my couch. I picked up my Bible to continue where I left off. Remember I told you I was right at verse 19 when the knock came at my door? Well, I continued my reading right at verse 20, and it reads, "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hears my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." I was floored! I trembled at the revelation of the Lord Jesus. I fell on my knees in reverential fear. I knew He was in the room, because after all, I did open the door. The whole thing came full circle. I understood now why He knocked instead of ringing the doorbell. I understood why He interrupted my reading at verse 19, right before I got to verse 20. I understood why when I opened the door there was no one there; no one in sight from all directions. What however I did not understand was why my Lord was outside. I know I did not pray as often, by myself, but I did pray daily. My relationship was not as personal as before, but I still loved the Lord deeply. The experience left me melancholy. I was very grateful to have had such an awesome visitation, but I was troubled for a very long time at the fact that the Lord had been outside. I calculated His position outside as being outside of my heart. But judging my own self, 1 John 3:20-21, I did not make the connection. I kept asking Him, for years, "Lord, why were You outside?"


Time Reveals God's Purposes

Scripture tells us that God knows the end from the beginning, Isaiah 46:10. So, many years had passed, and like any meaningful relationship, I walked with the Lord through hills and valleys. But isn't it comforting to know that the Lord will never leave us nor forsake us? We can trust His heart even when we do not understand His plan. On my journey so far, I've come upon some places that caused me to question God. I questioned His faithfulness, I questioned His love, I questioned His care, I questioned His word, and most dreadfully; I questioned His existence. It was during these doubtful times that my close encounter with Jesus, on that faithful mid-summer day in 1998, anchored my faith in God. The faithful Holy Spirit kept bringing back the Lord's visitation to me. Every time the enemy of my soul tried to steal my faith; the Holy Spirit would remind me of the Lord's visitation. Yes, the enemy came in like a flood, but this was how the Holy Spirit raised up a standard against him, Isaiah 59:19. He then opened my understanding and answered my troubling question. The Lord visited me because He knew times would come when the enemy would seek to destroy my faith in God. I would need a close encounter to thwart the enemy's plan. I am reminded of Thomas; he doubted the resurrection. But Jesus did not throw him out, he compassionately gave Thomas something to hold on to, something to help his faith, something he could see.


Ask Him to Come Over

Sometimes we find ourselves needing more than words, and God knows and understands that. He makes ways ahead of time to preserve, restore, and anchor our souls in Him. For me it was a divine visitation that God knew I would have needed in years to come. I am persuaded, not only by sight but by faith, 2 Corinthians 5:7. How about you? Are you finding yourself in need of assurance? Has the facts of life clouded your vision of the One you once fully trusted? Ask Him to restore you. Like King David who was a man after God's own heart, ask the Lord to restore the joy of His salvation and the confidence you once had in Him; Psalm 51:10-12. I did not ask for that visitation, but God knew what I would have needed in time to come. So, if it is sight that you need, a faith booster, just ask Him. He will do it.